I, like most people I believe, have ongoing chatter in my head. I sometimes catch myself internally nattering about something and then I won’t even finish the conversation before something else enters and I’m off again. I hardly ever resolve anything when I’m chattering away to myself. I used to catch myself doing sums, working out how much money I had in the bank and how much I’d earn and how much I’d be short and it would only ever leave me feeling anxious.
I did it yesterday when I was in the supermarket, queuing to pay for my bits. My head started saying ‘ooh this queue is taking a long time’ ‘what am I going to make for…’ ‘that man behind me is far too close’ ‘ wow look the Autumn magazine has pumkins…’ ‘that lady looks miserable.’ ‘BLAH BLAH BLAH’. However, this time I caught myself, so I looked up and around me and noticed everyone else was chattering to themselves as well. The place was pretty quiet apart from the bleeps of the tills but I could see and feel people chattering frantically away to themselves, and the atmosphere was pretty intense.
And so, I just stopped and focussed on connecting with the till worker lady, and I told her to have a lovely evening. I noticed, and connected to, a lady who was walking along smiling, she was so serene, she wasn’t nattering to herself she was just calm, just being. And so I felt calmer, I ignored the chatter and just focussed on the little nuggets of calm and beauty around me. I could feel my body relax.
Once I got out of my head the whole world seemed to slow down and I felt lighter and capable of anything.