18 Oct The Darkness and the Light
Hanging on my wall at home I have the following Brené Brown quote:
‘Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light.’
In her research and writings Brené Brown talks about how sadness, anger, confusion, deflation and insignificance aren’t feelings to be ignored, or feared. In reality, such feelings are there for us to experience, and learn from, and grow through. In fact, those emotions are the gateway to feeling joy, happiness and light.
Many of us shape our lives in such a way to avoid feeling those ‘darker’ feelings. We try to control situations, we stay in jobs we don’t enjoy or live in places that don’t suit us because the fear of things going completely wrong if we do make a move is too scary. We fear we won’t be able to handle the challenging emotions that arise in us if everything changed, if our lives turned upside down.
But really, challenging times are part of being human. Being with the ‘darker’ feelings is part of our evolution, our growth.
In my CTI coaching training we were encouraged to see all emotions as beautiful. And to remember that the real tragedy in life is sitting in the fearful stuck feelings, with the belief that we can’t navigate through all the emotions that come up in times of change.
The reality is we can be with those harder feelings. We can be with them, we can learn from them, we can grow because we have experienced them, and come out the other side.
Over time, as I’ve leant further and further into challenging situations that invite me to be with challenging emotions, I’ve come to understand that in order to navigate such times, self-care is crucial.
Having people around us who support us no matter what is incredibly helpful when going through challenge or change. Implementing self-care practices that help us feel safe and energised and calm and positive are crucial in the bid to avoid burning out along the way. We need to care for ourselves through the process.
If we want to feel truly alive in this life we have to lean in to those challenges, we have to be willing to go to the darkness in order to feel our light. Through that process it’s crucial to create a robust self-care system, so we don’t burn out in the process.
With love as always, Hannah and Team Bird
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